When You Get Something You Want, It Can Be Terrifying

Sometimes you think that you aren't ready for it, no matter how long you waited. That you won't be perfect at it. That something will go wrong, and it will be taken away. That you will find a way to screw it up. And man, are there so many ways to do that. Perhaps you forgot how hard it was to have what you hoped for, and find yourself coming up short. The moment of calm, of Zen and gratitude will come back. But it's okay to have some moments of doubt, of fear. Right? I just didn't expect it this time. And though I am usually a hoarder of knowledge, a lover of all facts... In this case, less is more. The books, the websites- they all make me tremble. It's just a feeling. It will pass. The calm will come back. I hope.